Hey Turds,
Say what!? Another newsletter already? We know what you’re thinking. To what or whom do we owe for this pleasure? Well look no further than to our very own Hannah Redfield who just passed her state boards! She has graduated from her apprenticeship and is ready to show the world (and Chris) that she is great…like almost Moxie great.
Hannah came to us in September of 2022 full of awe and wonder. Growing up in the deep woods of New Hampshire, she was never introduced to cable television or talking motion pictures. We could see that she had amazing potential for growth and knowledge. We never could have imagined how much she would transform from a country bumpkin to an incredibly badass barber! No more horses and buggies, and the days of churning butter are long gone. Hannah is onto new challenges and with her barber’s license, she is unstoppable.
We hope you enjoy reading this intensely Hannah issue. Please join us in congratulating her on this incredible achievement.
We love you Hannah and we’re so damn proud of you!
Love,
Chris & Jenny
HANNAH…Umm did you not just read above? Hannah is busy kicking ass and taking names. She is due for some much-needed rest (after she celebrates).
JENNY…Seriously…this issue is all about Hannah! Who cares about Jenny?
CHRIS…Chis is just figuring out how this whole situation might help him go fishing. Oh yeah, Hannah and stuff.
DEBY…Deby can’t even contain herself over the excitement. Go Hannah, go!
MOXIE…What the heck, everyone? Can you quit it with all this Hannah nonsense? She’s not even a beagle! Also, we didn’t even talk about how Moxie is the best study buddy and did all the things to help Hannah win. We can’t lose sight of my beagley greatness.
Guess what, I am so great that you won’t even believe this! Just this one time I am going to let Hannah be EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH, LITERALLY EVERY MONTH…BUT JUST THIS ONE TIME. That’s how great I am! This is very scary stuff. Actually, that’s April Fools…but I really had you going! Better luck next time, snack Mommy.
GRIPES AND GRATITUDE… What can I possibly say here that hasn’t already been said? Hannah is the biggest creep I have ever met, and she has a callous disregard for proper powder usage. It’s like she’s decorating for a prom over in her corner. Instead of using balloons and streamers she just dowses the place in powder and tosses paper towels around like they are confetti. Her taste in music is dreadful and we’ve already talked about her lack of TV and movie knowledge. I look forward to each day for Jenny and Hannah to gang up on me. Doesn’t matter what it is…I’m wrong. It’s OK…nobody cares.
I give Hannah so much crap (almost as much as she gives me). I am constantly threatening to fire her. It doesn’t matter that she’s the best employee I have ever had, everyone needs to be a little fearful and I find that mental torture is a great motivator!
I can be demanding and have extremely high expectations of people. I am not good at feelings, but I love my friends and family intensely. Maybe people don’t always appreciate my tangents or the way I insist on helping and supporting them. This isn’t some weird way of congratulating Hannah on her ability to tolerate my crap. That’s kinda messed up. It is important for me to acknowledge and accept my shortcomings and flaws…recognize how being in a room with me all day isn’t a cakewalk. We aren’t perfect at making it all work, but man we are damn good at it! I honestly can’t say it enough. Hannah, I am so grateful for you and your hard work. I know I constantly give you a hard time and I don’t tell you enough how much I appreciate you. You are family to me and Jenny and while that is always weird territory as business colleagues…in our case I feel good about calling us a family. Thank you for choosing us and thank you for showing up and working hard every day. I still think you use too much powder.
